Hello, friends! It’s Amanda, your Neurodivergent Millennial, sharing my thoughts as we wind down another year filled with challenges, celebrations, and a lot of personal growth. In the whirlwind of holiday festivities, I’ve taken some time to reflect on my experiences navigating life as an ADHD autistic individual in the vibrant chaos of the city.
Black and White Thinking: A Double-Edged Sword
Let’s dive straight into it: one of the most relatable struggles for those of us in the neurodivergent community is black and white thinking. I often find myself labeling my choices as “success” or “failure” with little room for gray areas. As I recently celebrated the holidays, I faced the age-old dilemma of drinking. After committing to a year of sobriety, I found myself indulging in a few drinks. In my mind, this translated to a failure. But each slip, though disheartening, taught me a valuable lesson about the slippery slope of habits.
Despite these moments of indulgence, I’m proud to say that I haven’t completely fallen back into negative patterns. Understanding my tendency toward black and white thinking has given me insight into the internal struggle of staying balanced. Our bodies crave homeostasis—a stable state that can make breaking bad habits feel nearly impossible. As the year comes to a close, it’s vital to confront these challenges head-on.
Strategies for Staying Grounded
Amid the holiday chaos, here are five strategies that have helped me maintain balance and avoid slipping into old habits:
1. Cling to Your Routine: The holiday season often uproots our daily routines, introducing more social gatherings and less time for recovery. For me, maintaining my workout routine has been essential. Exercise is my anchor, a way to regulate my emotions and exert control over my executive function. Even when everything around me feels chaotic, sticking to my workout schedule helps keep my mental state in check.
2. Set Short-Term Goals: Rather than overwhelming yourself with lofty resolutions, focus on small, achievable goals. For December, I aimed to work out 20 times. It may sound manageable, but trust me, finding the motivation to work out consistently during the holidays can be a Herculean task. When I initially decided to quit drinking, my only goal was to survive the holiday season without reverting to my old habits.
3. Set Yourself Up for Success: I’ve learned that enjoying non-alcoholic options makes a world of difference. I’m not a fan of plain water, but I discovered that flavored water or mocktail concoctions infused with fun ingredients (and yes, edible glitter!) can elevate my experience while avoiding alcohol. You deserve to enjoy festive drinks that align with your goals.
4. Surround Yourself with Like-Minded People: As I’ve worked towards personal growth, I’ve also learned the importance of surrounding myself with supportive individuals. Seek out those who celebrate your successes and encourage your progress rather than those who may inadvertently lead you back down old paths. While it can be difficult to let go of certain relationships, the support of people who understand your journey can be transformative.
5. Remember, It Starts With the Desire to Try: This one is critical. Change doesn’t happen overnight, and it often begins with a simple desire to improve. I often recall the joke from my childhood about cleaning my messy room: “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” Break your goals into manageable pieces, and celebrate each step forward.
As we approach a new year, it’s crucial to reflect on our growth and resilience. Christmas can evoke a mix of emotions—joy, nostalgia, and sometimes, disappointment. But within those feelings lies the promise of renewal. No matter how many drinks you’ve had or how many resolutions you’ve reconsidered, remember that every moment offers a chance to start anew.
Here’s to a new year filled with intentional choices, supportive relationships, and the courage to embrace all the shades of life. Cheers to us!
